Thursday, November 26, 2009

Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

I just have this thought that teen boys with long hair give off the impression that they are punks,or involved in gangs and drugs. I know this is not always the case but in my opinion it does give people the wrong impression. Think about it, how many honor roll,smart, well disciplined kids do you see with long hair?



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

You're not wrong, but you're not correct either. As long as its neat and clean a 13 year old should be allowed to at least control that part of himself. Hair is such a trival concern. And at that age they are trying to figure out who they are.



As my mama told me, pick your battles. Would you rather waste engery fighting him over hair or drugs? Smoking? Unsafe sex? Being friends with gang members? If every little thing about him is picked at and criticisized, he will be less likely to respond to the matters that are important.



I've known people with close cropped hair who don't even wash it!



I've included a link I recalled from Dear Abby which pertains to your question. I hope this helps.



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

As long as he keeps his hair clean, he should be able to choose the style. You are over-bearing.



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

Men need to be men.......(whatever their age)



Men need to start sucking it up and take on the roll of a man, not a woman!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

The real danger of this is when he does get out on his own he might try and make up for lost time. Maybe what you need to do is try and come to a compromise with him and allow him to be his own person without looking like a gang member or a stoner.



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

WHEN HE GETS INTO THESE HAIR STYLES , WHEN IT'S DISTURBING HIS IMAGE AND HE LOOKS BAD , YES YOU NEED TO STEP IN !!



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

It's not the hair, hair isn't important. It is completely about the attitude and the mannerisms of these kids. My son, the honor student, asked about growing his hair out, and this was my answer ...



I don't care if you grow out your hair, but you have to keep it neat and clean at all times. When you come to my table for a meal, your hair will be pulled back out of your face. If you can't accept those terms, then you need to get a haircut.



So far, he's kept his hair cut. :)



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

yes you should let him wear his hair any way as long as he keeps it presentable combed , clean that way.. cuz if you are hard on him about that he can rebel and do worse.. its ok to let him find himself who knows he may grow long hair and hate it and want it short its shouldnt be a big issue..just be involved and make sure he stays a good kid thats what counts...



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

It is ok, you are behaving as a mom, but maybe your son don't like it.



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

If all you have to worry about is the length of the hair, consider yourself lucky. Dr. Phil mentioned on one of his shows that we have to pick out battles, and the length of the hair is not one of the important ones.



As for what kind of kids (and adults) have long hair, engineers, computer nerds, musicians, artists; many of whom are on the honor roll, or have above intelligence.



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

I think you are too concerned about what others think of you. The reason you insist that your child have a hair style that you approve of is that you feel that it reflects on you. I guess its all about you.



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

G'day Tah,



Thank you for your question.



I understand what you are saying in that you want your son to look the part. You need to speak with him and make sure that he understands your concerns and you understand him.



You don't want him rebelling against you as many teenagers do. You might be able to come up with a solution that you may both be happy with.



Regards



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

about kids i don,t know, but i known many long haired hardworking men who do work, do pay their bills and do take responsibility. many of them are my friends. why are you soquick to judge anyway. i do think this is wrong!!!!



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

Yes. you are wrong for stifiling your child. At 13 children are beginning to learn who they are and what they like. He will go through a thousand phases when it comes to his image. He probably wont even keep his hair long for very long.



And secondly, you are wrong for holding on to such a stereotype. I was in Advance Placement Honors classes throughout junior high and High school, and many of the males in my class had long hair. It is not the hair the matters, but the mind that is under it. Let your son be his own person on this matter...



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

It is written a women's hair should be long.no wait, I mean short, no. kinda middle lenght. no bald, well. maybe you should leave it up to her?



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

i would say yes you should compromise with hem he is a teen in will not agreed with it in push away a compromise would be better



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

Not really....okay, sort of. Let him do what he wants with his hair, it's not necessarily indicative of involvement in a gang or drugs.



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

Do you know this? You can't really force anyone to do anything they don't want to do.



I imagine some will say this is free will.



Besides that, I shared the responsibility of raising a son. He had long hair when he was young. So did I. I don't now and neither does he.



The most important thing I can tell you is that you have the responsibility to teach your child. Teach your child how to respect his or her self and to respect others as well. You have the responsibility to teach your child to both live with dignity and to treat others with dignity.



If you succeed in doing this you will add great value to our world.



Your child will add great value to our world.



Hair length has nothing to do with any of this.



Am I wrong about insisting that my 13 year old son keep his hair short and neat?

I can understand why you would want him not to have long hair...but, you need to make a few concessions and if he keeps it clean and neat...it would be better than tatoos,sagging a*s pants, or body piercings.

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